The risk of theft sometimes leads to drastic measures. Are you familiar with the High-Tech Antitheft Bicycle Spray offered by Henry Cutler of WorkCycles? Same principle (but I have yet to find out if it works).
http://workcycles.com/workbike/bicycles/accessories/antitheft-spray.html

Of course I’m a huge proponent of this kind of behavior. As to the lovely bicycle’s question of why people would post pictures of their uglifications to message boards is that the intent it to deter theft and there is nothing wrong with taking pride in how you’ve gone about doing it. Nothing about that compromises the original intent. Some things would be silly, such as ripping a good saddle or mismatching pedals(?), but switching out a good saddle for a cheap one and ripping it? That would get my seal of approval.

No part of me would ever begin to think that there is anything shallow about keeping a bike’s appearance pristine, if that if what is right for the owner. But to suggest that uglification is an affront bicycle aesthetics sounds a bit insecure. Trust me, us uglifiers are not judging you.

Also, all my bikes are in far better shape than when I purchased them, as I overhaul all of my components; so don’t let the looks fool you into believing these bikes aren’t well taken care of. They’re only meant to fool the thieves.

I don’t need to uglify my Rocky Mountain Metropolis – it came that way.
I’m not sure that uglifying a bike really works anyway. Bike theft is a crime of opportunity. Locking your bike in a busy area with lots of people walking past is perhaps the best way to hold onto it.

@Amy – Looking at the two pictures of the Bianchi, the before picture doesn’t really do it for me at all, while the aesthetics of the after looks fine to me. Eye of the beholder, I guess.

Although, I don’t think I could ever try to encourage rust. Rust is bad.

Also, like you said, paying to dollar for a brand spanking new bike is a bit silly. You can get a top quality 20 year old bike that is already ugly and lovingly restore the components subtly, which is what I try to do.

This is a rather disturbing idea to me. I can’t imagine taking something I had purchased brand new and then attempting to make it look old and as used as possible. It’s like going to be a Chanel dress and taking spray paint to it so no one else wants it. It’s a bit perplexing to me. But, on the other hand, I say, to each his/her own, and if it makes them happy, then go for it. Afterall, it isn’t my money. However, I agree that part of the enjoyment of riding (for me) is that I enjoy the aesthetics of my bike.

@G.E. – I guess it is all a matter of perspective. If I looked at a bike in a similar way that I look at an article of clothing I would agree, but that thinking feels very foreign to me. I look at my bikes as machines. I want their guts to be working perfectly and be well greased and that’s what gets all my attention. At the same time, I wouldn’t walk down the street in my neighborhood in an Armani suit in a thousand years, and likewise I wouldn’t want to ride a bike down the street that looked like a thousand bucks, for much the same reason.

“Also, like you said, paying to dollar for a brand spanking new bike is a bit silly.” oops, this is not what I meant.

Corrected:

“…paying top dollar for a brand spanking new bike and uglifying it is a bit silly” is what I meant

When we were visiting Bruges in Belgium (where everyone biked) we asked someone why everyone also seemed to ride the same not-especially-sexy bicycle. The answer: to combat theft. Maybe part of developing a true bike culture is the cheap, possibly ugly, but nicely functional bike?

I ride old bikes. That pretty much does the trick.

Dottie,
As a long time commuter, old bike messenger, bmx racer, touring lover & all around anti-car guy (full disclosure: We still own 1 car) I must respectfully disagree with your last post. I live & work right near the Webster/Clybourn intersection and I have stopped kids from ripping off bikes/bike parts on more than one occasion and I don’t think it has ever been from the “ugly” or purposely “distressed” bicycles. It’s always from something newer or cleaner looking. Always. Multiple locks are great…if you want to carry around an extra weight…and I’m a guy who often rides around town, by myself, on our vintage Schwinn tandem all year round so I’m no weight weenie! However, currently I am on a Fuji 12 speed mixte I bought off a metal scrappers truck last month for $10. Best $10 I’ve spent in awhile! 30 minutes cleaning, lubing and adjusting and it still looks quite ugly but she rides like a dream…and it still has personality via my Astroboy zip-tied to the bars, our doggy’s old city tags rattling around attached to the back rack & a few lights. Heck, I just got in from a quick ride to Menards(saving more money) and a stop for cat food…my wife (she’s no lover of the cold) thinks I’m crazy. So that’s 2 cents from a neighborhood business owner who spends too much time at Starbucks on that corner and at times has confronted some young bike/bike part thieves. There is one thing I know for for sure….there really never seems to be a police officer around when you really need one but I’ve avoided any fisticuffs and have come away the victor in every encounter. Still ride the pretty bikes, I like pretty bikes, as an owner of 6 bicycles I have some pretty bikes but like anything the bling can and does catch the eye…but sometimes it’s the eye of a thief.

I am not into deliberately making a nice bike ugly in the faux patina and ugly stickers way, but I did deliberately resist any fancy updates and even any cleaning/shining to my old Raleigh so I could leave it for long periods of time in high theft areas of Manhattan. Multiple locks aren’t enough here. The thieves are just relentless.

@Dottie – “No one ever tells drivers to uglify their nice cars to prevent theft.”

Has anyone ever told you to uglify your bike?

I think we’re all best qualified to gauge the course of action most appropriate in our own environments. I do own one nice, expensive, new 4 digit road bike. And no, I’ve never done anything to uglify it. Twice heroin addicts have approached me and asked me how much the bicycle was worth. Another time, a little white trash kid on a bike came up to me, asked me how much it was worth and wanted to know where I was going so he could come around and steal it. I love that bike (but not as much as my cheapies), but locking it up is not an option. That bike draws attention because it looks valuable. This is not to say that what works best for me is ideal for others. Some people have bike lockers or secure indoor parking. In fact, I prefer others to have shinier prettier bikes than myself. I would also prefer that they park right next to me and use cheaper locks.

Now, I will say that I’m hard pressed to identify who uglifying a brand new bike would be the most appropriate action for. I guess it would have to be someone that did not feel comfortable working on their own bike while still wanting the perfection of a brand new bike. Or maybe someone who had a new bike fall into their lap. Anyone else would probably want to consider resale value. Still, that magazine article took everything to a ridiculous extreme. Mismatching pedals? There are plenty of top quality pedals out there that look like nothing. Intentionally rusting up your frame? So you can have rust stains all over your clothes?

@Patrick in Chicago – Patrick–Pics of your bike, please! I’m trying to figure out what my commuter bike is going to be for the spring and summer since my simple mountain/commuter bike will actually be used for mountain biking then. I have hills to contend with in Montana, so a sweet-looking 3-speed cruiser isn’t going to work for me. I’d love to see what a reworked 12-speed mixte looks like!

Dottie–You make biking look so beautiful, so I can see why the idea of uglifying a bike is painful. While I LOVE the new Dutch bikes and Electra’s Om in all their beauty, I don’t think they’re the bikes for me because of the frustration I’d have seeing them scratched. I need to focus on my kids, not my paint job. And if it was stolen in my bike-hungry college town? I’d definitely cry.

While I can’t see myself uglifying a bike, I can’t see myself getting a gorgeous bike. I’m just not to be trusted with something that precious. Gimme a reworked vintage bike I can call my own, warts and all.

It looks to me like the people spending time uglifying their bikes are taking as much pride in the appearance of their bikes as everyone on blogs like LGRAB and Lovely Bicycle. I doubt you would spend that much time and effort on the appearance of the bike, and then as much time again documenting and promoting your bike on the good old internet, without some sense of pride in the appearance of your bike.

To me, it’s just another way of making a bike your own, and if that’s what they like then more power to them. Some people like to accessorize their cars with spoilers and wheels and paint jobs, and some people like to have “sleepers,” cars with ratty paint but lots of power. There is the new trend of “rat rods” with flat black paint that are supposed to be appealing to the eye, but faux-”ratty” in some way. That’s what these uglified bikes remind me of.

Personally, my bikes look used because, well, they are. They’re old bikes that have dents, dings, and scratches, and peeling graphics because they’ve been loved over the years. My Honda Civic is much the same, with rusty spots, scratched up paint, dents and the like. But who cares? It’s got 150k miles and 18 years under its belt, and I think its looks reflect the fact that it’s performed well as a tool for those years.

Dottie,
My point was more that the attempted bike and bike part thefts that I’ve seen always seemed to be perpetrated against the prettier bike in the rack. The thieves just seem to gravitate to the better looking bikes if only to take just an personal accessory from it while ignoring the “ugly” bike with the generator hub or Campy parts group that may be locked up in the same rack. I wrote earlier that people should ride a good looking bike if they choose. I do sometimes. However, based upon my experience I feel that just as the general public notices a pretty ride before what they perceive to be a “clunker” so does the criminal.

This is funny. I spend a lot of time beautifying my bike (cleaning it, waxing it…totally against the Dutch standard). Well, Dutch bikes in general are pretty dull and in my opinion very ugly, yet these bikes are taken all the time like coins on a sidewalk. Because my bike stands out so much with its radical colors (OK maybe my bike is really ugly because I have bad color coordination), it has yet to be stolen. So bike uglification doesn’t deter theft, instead I think it promotes it because an ugly bike looks like an abandon bike–up for grabs.

To each his or her own, I think.

For my short commute (~3 miles), a 30-year-old Schwinn is just fine. If someone steals it, it’ll be a sad day, but I’ll not have lost too much money.

Friends who commute 10+ miles, however, would find the steel bike clunky. One has taken the paint off his good bike so it can be left outside without worrying about having the bike stolen. For him, it’s all about utility.

After all, when you make $15,000 a year, taking at $1,000 loss is a bit hard; I think there are a number of factors which must be taken into account.

Bike parts in very poor visual condition have marginal resale value, and consequently are of marginal interest to thieves. If you want to hold onto your bike, a coarse rasp over all the shiny bits (except spokes) is all that’s required*.

*frames are a different matter, but we’re talking about commuting bikes here, for which valuable frames aren’t the norm